Ssshhhh!!!!!! Don't Say That

By Aaisha

Why did we choose to marry? After a long time, I'm finally asking myself this question.

Some of you might judge me because you think my marriage might have issues. Who in today's world doesn't have it? But it's not that; I'm asking because I now understand why you're getting married after all these years. For us? for the community, or because it is our parents' duty? Because if you see a wedding from an Islamic perspective, it is pretty lovely. But because of how difficult our culture has made it for both males and females, they only helplessly discover that they made the wrong decision years later.

In Islam, a woman moves into her husband's home after marriage, whereas in our culture, she moves into her in-law's house. In Islam, a woman should follow her husband's orders and carry out his domestic duties, but in the community, she has to do anything her mother-in-law asks of her. In Islam, a girl can have privacy; however, according to our society, joint families do not have privacy.

These are some of the things I'm mentioning, but there are many other things that, regardless of whether a girl performs them or not, are rude. So tell me, where is it written that, as a girl, you must obey everyone and carry out the orders of your in-laws? These "in-law difficulties" cause more than 50% of marriages to fail.

According to popular belief, a woman who disobeys her husband will burn in hell. Her husband wants her to "follow my mother and be a statue in front of her because everything she does and says is always right."

Will Allah Pak send me to hell for disobeying my husband's mother?

Is this what Islam teaches us?

Due to his more significant burden of responsibility than a woman, marriage is more challenging for men. Along with answering his wife, he must obey his mother. A man who strikes a balance between his mother and wife will have a successful marriage. The credit will collapse if he places greater weight on any side, and since this is usually the mother's side, it will almost certainly happen.

On the front lines, we see a happy couple living with children and others together. But up close, there is no connection. Both husband and wife are just functioning to do their duties. But they are not living. Our society says you must destroy many others to enjoy your life.